Funny Stories: Volume Three

It's really fun to go through those I have noted and (at last) SHARE them! Hopefully a few of these are able to tickle some of your funny bones.

Two BEST Lessons
These were the two funnest lessons I have taught so far and I think it's all because of the imagination we were able to use and manipulate. I LOVE the imagination these students have. AMAZING!!!

During math:
Honey-berry-oogalees eating the DELICIOUS honey berries!!!!
It was kind of an idea I made on the spot -- through inspiration from the textbook. I didn't know they would throw themselves so entirely into the idea. The students turn into honey-berry-oogalees (imaginary creatures) and they want to eat the honey berries (wooden hexagon blocks) SO much!!!

But, someone has been sneaking into the basement and TAKING the honey-berries, what will they do?!

They must solve the math problem: how many honey berries did the other oogalee take based on the number of berries left?

When the “honey-berry-oogalees” are sleeping, I get to choose one to go sneak the berriers while I tell them what they are dreaming that "night." (It's usually about the DELICIOUS honey-berries.) Please keep in mind that (OF COURSE) all this MUST be done with a certain “British/crackly/bear” accent.

(OH!! Delight! Delight!! I get to act, they get to talk loudly, and then they learn some stuff too.)It was such a thrill!

The second funnest lesson -- The Magic Tissue Box
Once again, I didn't think I could engage them so intensly, but once I saw the opportunity I RAN with it. It all began when I was just trying to show them (and I think the concept was actually lost because of the thrill of the magic tissue box,) that a number subtract the same number always equals zero. I had them write their number on a piece of index card, I wrote that same number on the other index card, and had another index card with "zero" (written in marker) already inside the tissue box. I pretended to toss the two index cards in the box while I "mixed" the cards up inside the box. When I pulled out the marker-zero card with no other cards remaining (I stuffed them into my pocket -- illusion) they were agog! Students were springing from their seats. They were amazed. They wanted to inspect the box. They couldn't prove my trickiness, however.

But then, (I hadn't thought the next part through,) I needed to show them that a number subtract zero was still the same NUMBER!!! I said my magic tissue box could do that too, but of course it could NOT. (I still had the marker zero inside the box). Somehow, though...I squashed all the necessary cards into my pocket and pulled out the number card. They were astounded and I was hyped up. I don't think I will ever pull that one out again.

Boy, boy, BOY! Two boys were pretending to play Star Wars attacking games while they waited in car-line. One was pretending to hold "the force" over the other (no contact between the boys) and the one being "choked" by "the force" actually looked like he was being choked. He actually sounded like he was being choked. His face was turning red and purple, his eyes were rolling in the back of his head, and his hands were held out as if he were trying to defend himself. All this without ANY contact from the other boy!! I have never seen such amazing skills. Boy.

As I walked one student to the office to wait for his mom after school one day he started to speak to me,
"Mrs - Miss - Mrs - Miss Martin?"
Teacher: "Yes?"
Student: "I would much rather call you Mrs. Martin."
Teacher: "Why?"
Student: "Because you should be married."
Teacher: "Why?"
Student: (short pause) "Because you are old!"
Teacher: "OLD?! How old to you think I am?!!"
Student: "Ahh...sixty-six."
Teacher: "You think I am sixty-six?!"
Student: "Yeah, you're older than my mom."

They will often give me bits of their snack and place them as offerings on the overhead. I have tried to stop such practices, but they are persistent. Once, when there was a rather large amount of snack-offerings sitting on the overhead, I asked, "What are you doing?" One of the students replied, “we are trying to make you fat, Miss Martin.” Oh, thank you.

After a recess discussion between students:
“Is fire-flashman real?"
"Is that him flying through the sky?”
"No, he is not real. He is not flying through the sky. That is an airplane. Walk to class." (My business response.)

“Guess what I have for snack Miss Martin?" (She pulls out a baggie of a cut-up chocolate chip mint power bar.) "Look at these BAD BOYS!! Yum, yum!”

“Mew, mews – here they are!” (She likes talking to the picture of kitties on her homework folder when she gets it out to turn it in.) "Good bye mew mews!"